Monday, October 26, 2015

Now how do you like them apples?

Applesauce bitch. Alright. Obligatory pop culture reference out of the way, let us move on.

A few weeks back the wifey wanted to go apple picking. While I was tempted to question what was wrong with the apples at the grocery, I decided it was best to just go along with this one. 

So now we have a metric crap ton of apples. 

The largest of all of the crap tons.
Also I never miss an opportunity to remind Mrs. Rubber Ducky what will happen to her if she does not keep in line!

So as the family chef, I was tasked with finding something to do with all these apples. 

Baby Applesuace

1 apple
1 tablespoon water


Core, skin, and cut the apple into chunks (about a dozen chucks per apple worked nicely). 

Add the chunks and water to a pot. Cover. Simmer for 10-15 minutes.

Baby food recipes? Am I really that desperate for things to blog about? Or has parenthood reduced my brain to the consistency of applesauce? You decide!

Drain. Food processor the ever living hell out of them.

Voilà. Your baby is living the puréed dream.

Honestly, picking the a spoon was the hardest part of this whole process.
It is applesauce for a baby. What do you want?

Since I am not supposed to put pictures of my child on the internet this is what you get: hands. Are you happy paranoid mommy brigade!?!?! 
BTW I really am feeding him in this picture, you just cannot tell. We are both holding the spoon. It is really quite adorable... not that you will ever know.

Apple Pie

6 cups cored, skinned, and thinly sliced apples (about 7-8 small apples)
1 tablespoon lemon juice (or less to taste)
3/4 cup sugar
2 tablespoons flour
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/8 teaspoon nutmeg
1 store bought pie rust (graham cracker)
3 tablespoons butter
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup flour


Boil the apples for 10-15 minutes. Drain. Sprinkle with lemon juice.

Preheat to the oven to 375°.

Mix sugar (table not the brown sugar), 2 tablespoons flour, cinnamon, and nutmeg in a large bowl. Transfer the apples to that bowl and mix thoroughly. Pour into the pie crust.

Using a pastry blender, combine the butter, brown sugar, and 1/2 cup flour. Mix until it resembles course crumbs. 

Evenly top the pie with the as many of the crumbs (the more the better IMHO) as desired. Cover the edges of the pie pan with foil.

Bake for 25 minutes. Remove foil. Bake for 25 minutes more or until the top is golden brown and the desired consistency.


As I skinned and sliced the apples, I stored them in cold water to avoid excessive browning. I am not sure if this was in any way worth while since they are being used in a brown sauce. Oh well, it made me feel fancy.

Oh you are going to judge me for using a store bought crust? Really!?! Have you made pie crust? Let me tell you there are few convenience items I use when cooking. Pie crusts are boring and tedious to make so totally worth it.

I like my apple pie applies to have the next to no consistency left. So I boiled. If you like a little more crunch, lay off the boiling. In fact that kind of has me wondering what my pie would be like if I puréed that too.

The "crumbs" did not turn out to be very consistent. So I kind of mashed it into a paste with my fingers, then separated it into pieces as I saw fit. I did not use all of it though. Once I could not see apple anymore, I added a few more for good measure, and quit. The topping was so delicious.

The pie recipe is from Better Homes and Gardens New Cook Book. If I have not plugged this before, I am going to do it now (or again). That is one of the best cook books I own for being basic and comprehensive. Everybody has to start someplace and this is a hell of a good place if you ask me. It has a couple intro chapters and cooking in general and then is packed with all the classic recipes you could want.


Pie is awesome (duh). I did not eat the apple sauce but baby liked it.

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