Wednesday, January 17, 2018

Cheesy Swedish Meatball Bake

So let us get this out of the way: FUCK Tastemade. A fb page (who I shall not mention for fear of associated them with these schmucks) reposted their video. And thus began a journey...

A blurry journey apparently.

The still before the video looked tasty, so I watched the video. It looked really good (the word Gruyère always gets me excited even if I cannot pronounce it) but no specifics. No link to the recipe either. No comments with the recipe. Nothing.

Now depending on the day's solar flare activity, the relative humidity in Johannesburg, and the frequency of the letter "L" in headlines that day, it is about 50/50 if I would have walked away or continued. That day there was just enough "L"s to continue. I posted for help. I tried their fb page and I could not find the original post. I tried their webpage. It just wanted me to install some app, which is a pet peeve of mine so no. A few hours later somebody replied with this mess "Type the recipe name in the fb search bar. It'll give you a couple recipes. One of them says full recipe. Click on it and the video comes up, but, on the right is a link to the recipe." I tried to follow these instructions, I really did because at this point I was commited. Anyway a few more hours pass by and someone replies with a link. I click the link and low and behold it is the same DAMN VIDEO but on their website instead of fb!!! I was about to give up and luckily I noticed a print button just below the video. I clicked on that and I PDF'ed the recipe. Which brings us to today.

Resources:
1 pound ground beef
1 pound ground turkey
1/2 cup panko breadcrumbs
2 large eggs
2 tablespoons butter, melted
1/4 teaspoon nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon allspice
Salt and pepper to taste
2 cups egg noodles, cooked
1/2 cup Gruyère cheese, shredded

6 tablespoons butter
4 tablespoons all-purpose flour
3 cups beef broth
1/2 cup heavy cream
Salt to taste

Method:
In a large bowl, combine ground meats, panko, eggs, melted butter and
seasonings. Roll mixture into balls.

In a skillet on medium-high heat, cook meatballs in olive oil, until browned on all
sides. Transfer to a paper towel-lined tray and set aside.

Prepare the gravy. In the same skillet, melt butter and whisk in the flour until
lightly browned. Slowly pour in the beef broth while whisking continuously. Keep
whisking and cooking until slightly thickened. Stir in the heavy cream and season
with salt and pepper.

Place meatballs in the gravy and simmer for about 3 to 4 minutes.

Cook egg noodles to al dente and drain. In a baking dish, mix noodles together
with meatballs and gravy. Sprinkle with shredded Gruyère cheese.

Bake at 375 degrees F until slightly golden and bubbling. 

Commentary:
I refuse to link to these jakovasaurs. I cited my source, that is all they get.

And Darth Vader Mr. Potato Head went to pieces when I asked him to help! 

I fried the meat in two batches because it was a lot a meat.

Scalding but tasty

I made one radical change: ground turkey was supposed to be ground pork. I have no regrets. The turkey made the meatballs "lighter" than I think pork would have. I think it was a really pleasant change and would probably stick with it in future go.

A few things I would change in the future. This needs more egg noodles and cheese. I would go as far as to say double both.I used a 9x13 pan. I would use something smaller next time. The cheese kind of disappeared due to the large surface area.

The leftovers kept really well. This could easily be a meal prep Sunday kind of recipe.

Conclusion:
I get it, we all have to get paid. Seriously though, fuck Tastemade and anyone else who "posts" recipes and then make you jump through this shit. If your business model involves making my life more difficult: I hate you, your children, your children's children, their pet dog, your favorite holiday, and the color of the shirt you were wearing the day you made the post.

But the meatballs were pretty good... but not great.

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